In general, I am not good at waiting, I hate it. Although, is anyone good at waiting? People say I am patient, and I guess I can be in the things that matter, but, day to day, I am not. If I am told something is going to take “X" amount of time, and it takes longer…it is a STRUGGLE for me. If I have a gift for you, I almost ALWAYS give it to you right away before it is truly meant for, because I just cannot wait to give you whatever it is. Aaron hates that by the way, he tells me I always ruin his surprises. I have kept a few over the years, but he is right, I just want him to have whatever the gift or surprise is now. 😊
Just this week, I green lit a shelving project we have been meaning to do since we moved in, and REALLY meaning to do since we replaced all our floors a few months ago. The room we are planning to use as the nursery has been our storage, a.k.a Room of Requirement, since we have moved in. Over the 4 years we have lived here, I have deep cleaned it, and got rid of things about once a year. But like most spaces of that nature, it always fills back up. Well, in an effort to place the items in that room currently in a new space, our home needed some storage solutions. Thus, Aaron is installing shelving in the office closet, additional shelves in the utility/laundry room, and a few rows of shelves in the closet that will soon belong to a little love. Just getting us one baby step closer.
With all that said, I gave the green light for this shelving adventure, with a caveat, “it needs to take only 24 hours for instillation.” HAHAHA. This “requirement” was two-fold. Part wishful thinking and hoping it would be quick, and part knowing no project has ever taken Aaron only a day…it is always about six times longer to complete than initially quoted. Thus, I needed to mentally prepare myself for yet another construction project in my home lingering for days. So, as you can guess, Aaron has been working on this since Monday, and here I am writing this on Thursday evening. HAHA. Just another day in the Wegenka Home. Here are some current, in progress, photos. Although, I should have taken one of the garage, where Aaron has already cut all the wood, all that is left is to install. But, it's hot out there y'all!!
Waiting, even though I may hate it and it makes me uncomfortable, is part of life. It has been a constant part of our lives for some time. I believe we all go through periods of waiting. I have come to find these times as important and necessary for the conversion of my heart in my walk with Christ.
In a previous post, I said that God is always right on time. And I truly believe that. Over the past 14 years of wanting so badly and praying so deeply for a child…well waiting has been really, really, really hard. But it has also been really, really, really fruitful. Both Aaron and I have learned some valuable lessons about ourselves, about our marriage, and the Father’s love for us. In our waiting we may feel it is just that, lifeless, still, and waiting. And it is that, on our part, at times if we let it. But, never on God’s part. He is always alive, moving, and making a way.
We have found that The Lord, in His perfect time, is just that, perfect. He waits for an opportune time, for the perfect moment to gift us with whatever blessing He has in store, His best. He does not give it to us right away, like every birthday gift I have ever bought Aaron. He plans the perfect moment. The BEST moment. In the meantime, we are purified through our waiting. Our hearts mold to His will. And we are prepared and refined for what The Father has in store for us next.
I cannot begin to tell you all the little moments of waiting, and all the lives that have moved, and prayers that have been prayed for us and from us to get to this point of our journey. Aaron and I are very aware and are very humbled. Seeing God come through in this way in an overwhelming rush, like a damn releasing all its water at once. All these years, all the prayers, all the support of our loved ones. It feels like God was just storing it up…and we were waiting…and praying…and waiting…and all of a sudden, in the most perfect pre-destined moment, this beautiful, life changing, powerful, release.
The past two months, since the news of our adoption to us, it has been just that, a reckless force of God’s love and might. God is making things move in our lives, and we are in complete awe. Last week, after months of searching for work (he had gotten let go in March), Aaron was offered a job at two different companies!!! Both of which he would have loved to work for!!! He settled on one that has offices near Richmond and Kirby and he starts on Monday. He has applied at this firm a few times over the years, so he is THRILLED to be working there. Aaron’s employment, as you can imagine, was a stress point for us. With bringing a child into our family we knew he needed work. And knew this job (not like some of his previous), needed to be one he loved and made him happy. In a moment of prayer, the Lord spoke to my heart, “Kristin, why would I bring you and Aaron a child and not take care of you completely.” It was that moment, that we both let the job search in a sense go, and boy did the Lord come through! Thank you for those who prayed for that knot of Aaron’s employment to be undone. Another baby step.
This week, in the midst of life, we also sent off some paperwork and a large payment to the adoption agency. Signing these papers and sending this check made this all feel real, in a way it hasn’t before. Like this is truly happening. This next week, we anticipate finishing our book about us with them, and they will begin showing us to mothers as we wait on our Home Study to finalize. I laughed and told Aaron, that I don’t think I have written a check that large since we bought our home. I want to say this was another baby step…but it was, quite large…so let’s say an Aaron sized step. 😉 This particular step was a lot easier for us to take because of all of your love and support. Thank you to all who have donated on the GoFundMe site that the Stanzels & Garzias created for us. It is truly overwhelming, and we will never be able to thank you enough for this gift you are bringing into our lives. We are blessed by you and how you have poured out love on us. You can read here where the funds are going, in case you missed my update on that. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
It is odd, and perfect, that the past few weeks, all of the waiting and prayers have started to make sense. Just this morning, a friend sent me an Instagram post of some letter art that read, “When I wait, you strengthen my heat.” This rings so true to me. Aaron and I truly feel that these years of waiting have been so valuable. I do feel my heart has been strengthened. Even now, when we are closer than we have ever been, and there is still waiting yet to do, I feel strengthened.
Thank you for walking and praying with us in our waiting.
-Kiki
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